Mr. Weigel

"Follow your passion."  That may be the best career advice that we can give our children.  It may also be the hardest thing for a teenager to do these days.

When I was a kid (yes, it's going to be one of those posts) if we said there was nothing good to watch on T.V., it was because we only had three channels.  Five if the weather was good and you could nudge the dial just right to pick up a Dayton station.  My kids have hundreds of stations, plus a computer, plus video games, and cell phones.  They are bombarded with input; yet, I can pretty much guarantee they will be bored two minutes after summer starts.  When I was a kid everybody started doing something for money by age 12.  You mowed lawns, walked dogs, babysat or delivered the newspaper.  We were crazed to get our driver's license the moment the state said we could.  Now that we are all afraid to allow our children to be more than 5 feet from us without a cell phone and a chaperone, and our kids are so use to being directed and protected in all aspects of their lives, they lack experience.  They don't build forts, mow lawns, babysit, make mud pies, and maybe even eat a few of those mud pies on a double dog dare.  Yet we expect them to choose what career path to follow at 18 when they have almost no experience on which to build their decision.

This year, Max took an engineering class.  I'm pretty sure that everyone in his school wants to be an engineer, a sports manager (which I can't believe is actually a degree) or a doctor.  It must be some rule or something because almost all of them pick those careers.  My dad was an engineer.  My brother is an engineer.  I'm not really totally sure what an engineer does, other than object to spending money and tell corny jokes.  I wasn't so sure Max really knew either.  When he was signing up for classes last year, there were two high school engineering classes offered.  We read the descriptions of both and he chose to take one this year.  He LOVED this class.  It gave him the opportunity to build things like motors and tools.  It turns out THAT is what an engineer does, which is kind of surprising considering how woefully lacking my father and brother are when it comes to home improvement projects.  Max even had the opportunity to weld.  He came home that day and said, "I think I want to be a welder."  It's the first time that Max has expressed a genuine interest in any kind of career.  I looked up the average salary, benefits, job outlook and earned income vs. training expense and decided that was a dandy idea!  He is going to take a class over the summer to see if that field or a related field is something he would truly like to pursue.  It may not be, which is alright.  The important thing is that Max is gaining experience so that he can find the path to a career he enjoys.

Mr. Weigel, thank you for providing Max with an experience that piqued his interest.  Not sure what path he might follow in the long run, but I know your class is helping him find his way.  That is an amazing educational gift.

Mr. Veraldo

Well, before yesterday's bird incident....Mr V. was going to be my thank you.  It is exam week at the high school.  Personally, I believe that high school exams were developed by people who were neither teachers nor parents as a means to torture those of us who are.  Max is fortunate that he has teachers who give out study guides.  Unfortunately, Max lost his mostly finished study guide for Spanish.  Then Mr. V found it (Yeah!) and gave it back.  That is one thank you.  As it turns out, Mr. V and I must have kids about the same age because last night I saw him at the choir concert.  He mentioned that the exam schedule had changed, to which I responded "WHAT?!?!?!??!"  Not sure how much of a difference it made, but it was better than Max walking into school not knowing at all.  I'm pretty sure that Max is not the star student in that class, but Mr. V has been very kind and patient...can't ask for more than that.

Thank you Mr. Veraldo!

Cliff

Remember how I said I had great neighbors???  I have REALLY great neighbors!!!!

As a single mom, I learned how to snake a toilet, fix dry wall, build a backyard family swing and hang Christmas lights.  However....I'm still not so good with dead creatures, disposing of dead creatures or smooshing really big spiders.

Today, the dogs ran out into the back yard.  I could tell they had found something very interesting that I was not going to be happy about at all.  At first, the way they stood watching, I thought it was a toad.  When I got closer, I realized it was a dead bird.  Oops!  Mostly dead bird.  Dead I might have scooped up and pitched....mostly dead?  Not so much.  Cliff was playing with his boys next door.  I asked him if he could take care of it.  He said, "Does it need to be put out of it's misery, or just scooped up?"  I told him it was a doctor Kevorkian-Doolittle kind of situation.  In the end, the bird was a little more alive than we had both anticipated.  It managed to leave my yard which all 3 of us (me, Cliff and the bird) were happy about.

Cliff, thanks for stepping up to take care of a dying bird that wasn't actually dying and managed to fly away to greener pastures...or at least a more aggressive dog.  I appreciate your help when I was far too squeamish to take care of it myself. 

Mom

Ok....first of all, it is hard for one parent to be two.  Especially if there are three kids and the the "one" is working full time.  You will not find that acknowledged any place else....so I'm just going to say it.  Second thing tonight....I'm pretty sure that final exams were invented to torture parents. 

Mom...after many years of torturing yourself with my final exams....thank you for coming back with round two. 

Gale & Matt

I decided to make pasta salad.  It kind of got away from me.  So I invited some family over to help eat it. This all had to be done by 3 to accommodate Max's work schedule.  Happy bonus.....my sister offered to drive Max to work.

Matt & Gale, thank you for making that trek so I didn't have to do it.  Josey and Sam were happy to get to go to the pool instead.

Craig

Little late with the post.

I got a new phone on Saturday.  While some people relish such upgrades in technology, I do not.   I got rid of my flip phone only when it no longer flipped.  I got a Blackberry next which is the least intelligent of the smart phones.  This time, I got a real smart phone.  I think they call them that because the ability to pull it out of the box, set it up, and use it efficiently is an IQ test.  Spoiler alert, I'm at least one standard deviation below average on this norm referenced standardized test.  (If you know what letters like ETR, IAT, and RtI mean...that was actually kind of funny.)

After an hour of playing with, and totally screwing up my phone, I headed back to the store where Craig saved the day by clearing out bad things, getting my main page set with the really important apps (Facebook) and showed me how to download those apps that are essential for daily living, like Bubble Totem.  Now when my phone rings and I hear Back in Black, I know it's Max.  When I hear the Plain White T's I know it's Matt.  The lyrics to My Girl signals my girl is calling.  How I survived all those years with just a regular Nokia sound, I will never know.  Thank goodness I don't have to go back to it.

Thank you Craig for helping me get my phone set up.  I did mess up my front page one more time, but my daughter fixed it.  Thanks for showing her some tricks too.

Kayla's Posh Pets

Several days ago, I received a coupon in the mail for dog grooming.  I have not had a dog groomed in years.  I have been using a wash them yourself dog wash.  But this coupon was the same price as the wash yourself, so I just couldn't resist.  Before I took John Boy, he was shedding like crazy.  His winter under coat was coming out and making my house a fuzzy mess.  They did a great job of getting all of the hair out.  When I wash John Boy, I usually have to clean up hair for days after.  Even the last groomer I used didn't do this nice of a job de-shedding him.  John Boy has also had his nails cut a little too short on one or 2 occasions which made him a little squeamish about nail clipping.  Not with these people.  Kayla's reported that both dogs did really well.  The place was clean, much faster than some other places and provided a nice overall experience.

Kayla's Posh Pets, thanks for doing such a great job with my dogs.

Matt

Not to be lame.....but I have to thank Matt again.  He hung a bunch of pictures and storage bins for me as we'll as fixing things here and there.

Thank you Matt.

Matt

Usually, when Matt says, "I'm on my way" that means that he will be leaving in the next 3 hours.  So when the doorbell rang in the middle of dinner, I was THRILLED to find Matt on my front door step.  It was a welcome surprise on a dreary day.  He was a wonderful and welcome addition at our dinner table.  He then worked the very large knot in my shoulder back into a plain old muscle while talking about a number of boy things with Max which saved me from pretending I had any knowledge or interest in the topic.  He is now sitting and watching T.V. with me which I find wonderfully comforting in a very boring completely content kind of way. 

Thank you for coming in tonight Matt and bringing peace to my life. 

McDonald's Morning Team

I am NOT a coffee drinker.  In fact, I don't like any hot beverage at all.  Not tea, not cocoa.  I am a pop girl.  Specifically....I like Diet Coke form McDonald's.  Almost every morning I stop to get one on my way to work.  The people at MY McDonald's know me.  They know I prefer a Styrofoam cup, even though it is not green at all.  I hit the door, my cup is on the counter and usually my twenty cents change too accompanied by a bright smile.  Makes my mornings a little more bearable. 

Thank you McDonald's Morning team....you make my day.

Ryan

If you go all the way back to my Annie post, you will find a reference to a person not yet named.  Well now he's named.  His name is Ryan.  In that post I talked about how he was buying clothes for a student.  This  was both nice and very typical of this teacher.  But not what this post is about.

Let me say, I have had the opportunity to work with some amazing people who taught me a lot about best practice.  I have also spent a lot of time reading research to build on that knowledge.  I have very definite ideas about what works, what doesn't, and how things should look.  Fortunately, the most important thing I learned is "follow the data."  I say that, because every preconceived idea about how to work with students with significant needs in a self-contained classroom went right out the window this year because of Ryan.

What I learned that I didn't know before:  1) Kids with a variety of disabilities and behavior problems benefit from meditation.  I guess that should make sense....I just didn't know it was possible to get them to do it without actually seeing it in practice.  Whatever you are imagining...you aren't even close.  I couldn't explain it.  I just know what the data said.  2) News 2 You can be used to scaffold in such a way that it becomes a really high level language activity that builds grade level vocabulary.  Until this year, I hated News 2 You.  I can admit that now, even though it's almost sacrilegious for an SLP to say it.  3)  Kids with autism, even severe autism, respond better when you speak to them like a normal person instead of using that "autism talk" that I had been taught before.  I actually knew this before, but I have never seen a teacher use it to the fullest extent possible with such success.  In fact, Ryan uses high level language all the time to build vocabulary.  Maybe even more than what the kids in the regular classroom use.  It's kind of amazing.

I loved the way this teacher ran this classroom.  My highest compliment to a special ed teacher is to say that I would want him or her to teach my child.  Sam would be lucky to have Ryan as a teacher.  Not sure Ryan would feel the same way about having Sam...but you know...whatever.

Ryan, thanks for teaching me even more than your students.  I had my doubts on day one...but I was a believer long before the year was over!  And I know I'm not the only one because my office mate said to me just last week, "You know....Luken's a really good teacher."

Josey

This morning.....I woke up and thought....OH NOOOOOOOO!!!!!  I forgot to write my thank you. 

GUILT! GUILT! GUILT! GUILT!

Luckily, I had my little voice of reason, "Just write it today, Mom.  No big deal."  Just like that...I felt better.  Because Josey is my rule following queen....if SHE says it's no big deal...it's no big deal.

Melissa

Thank you for your support.

Fr. Wessling

Years ago, while I was still married, we went to a Sunday service where Fr. Wessling presided.  He talked about vacation with his family going into detail about nieces and nephews both young and old.  He ended his homily by saying that even on vacations, mothers still work.  Little bone of contention in our household...decided to keep my eyes forward, but we all knew what I was thinking.  Later that week, I found out I was going to Hilton Head for a week of time alone and relaxation.  I'm sorry, but that may have been more of a miracle than the transformation of the bread and wine.  But it is not what I'm saying thank you for today.

Fr. Wessling presided today.  The reading today was "one body, many parts" and Fr. Wessling gave a history lesson about Vatican II that basically focused on acceptance and conscience.  Fr. Wessling, thank you for such a wonderful homily on a rainy Saturday evening.  

Kelly

Thanks for the phone call.

Mom

Thanks for being on call today.

Kaitlyn

You know that saying.....It takes a village to raise a child?  Sometimes, all you really need is an extra sibling.  You would think that the middle of 6, 4 boys and 2 girls, would NOT want to claim even one more relative.  Not Kaitlyn.  She steps up whenever there is a need. 

Kaitlyn....thanks for watching out for that "bonus" brother you have claimed!

Amy

Who I never actually call Amy......only Martini.  It was nice to hang with somebody who is truly awesome at their job.  Thanks for your input.

Mr. Kinsinger

There are several people who might think that classic autism and power tools don't mix.  Back when Sam use to take down large sections of drywall and disengage the alarm systems by ripping the wires out of the ceiling it sure seemed like a bad idea to me!  But Mr. Kinsinger has bravely gone where no man dared to go before.....Sam in woodwork class.

I'm sure when the idea was first introduced, he must have thought "ARE YOU CRAZY?????"  I know I thought it sounded a little crazy.  Sam on the other hand, thought it was a splendid idea.  He is taking his second year of it now.  This year he was allowed to use the table saw to cut a piece of wood....which he is proudly displaying in his room.  Today, he got to use a nail gun.  His teacher wrote a note that said he LOVED it!!!!!

Thank you Mr. Kinsinger for stepping up to the challenge.  Sam loves your class.  I love that he is so proud of his work.  The expression on his face when he brings something home or when I ask about what he did is absolutely priceless.

Mom, Max, Sam, Josey, Matt

Too much to be thankful for to just say it to one person.  So here it goes....

Thank you Max, Sam and Josey for a great Mother's day.  It isn't the gifts (which I loved) it is simply your existence in my life that I appreciate more than any words could ever say.  You three are my greatest gift and achievement. 

Mom, thanks for that whole "giving birth thing" and watching Sam so I could have a lovely dinner with the wonderful Mr. L.

Thank you Matt for picking up the tab for the family lunch and our dinner.  Thank you for putting up my storage boxes so my house is ever so slightly less cluttered.  Thank you for filling up my gas tank as well as my "love tank" (Real Housewives reference...don't assign some other meaning.)

Today was a day truly filled with thankfulness.

Pam

Thank you for hanging with Sam so I could hang with Matt.

Ramona

Ramona is one of the zillion people who help me help Sam.  I will just be honest, as both a parent and a professional, sometimes the laws and policies that are meant to protect Sam, end up hurting more than they help.  Ramona has done a fantastic job of balancing requirements and needs.  I personally know what a difficult balance that is.

Ramona, thanks for watching out for us.

Jack

My life would be so much easier if I had a crystal ball.  Actually, that's not true.  If I had a crystal ball, I would probably just stay in bed, hiding under the covers most of the time paralyzed by fear of what was coming next.  What would make it easier is to have an instructional manual that would tell me exactly what decisions I am supposed to make in regard to my children.  Of course, with my luck, my manual would be like what you get from IKEA....way too complicated and in Swedish.  Maybe, in the end, it is best that I am left to my own devices of muddling through, with my fingers crossed, hoping I am not screwing up too badly.

Luckily,  I meet people along the way who are almost as good as a crystal ball and way better than a Swedish instructional manual.  That is because they know all the options and resources. Jack, thanks for the information on the school in Cincinnati.  It may be the best fit of all!

Sarah

Thanks for the phone call.  That was some good information.  Hope to see you at soon!

Kelly

Thank you for checking up on me today.  And thank you for getting the BYOD packet for me too. 

CB

I know nothing about cars.  Therefore, I must depend on the honesty of others when it comes to maintenance.  Fortunately, I have a very reliable place to take my car.  Today, I got my oil changed.  I thought I needed new breaks, but I was told that they were fine and I should wait a few more months at least.  AND I got my car back lickety split, which is always paramount in the single parent household.  Thanks CB.

Springdale people

Yesterday was comforter washing day.  My washer and dryer are too small to wash and dry any of the comforters or quilts in the house.  Sam does not like to see his blanket leave the premises.  The only reason he is willing to consent is because I promise him they will return before bed.  When I dropped them off, the girl behind the counter said they would be ready by 3.  They guy said no, they wouldn't.  I started to explain I needed at least the one returned by 3 but before I could finish the guy said, "Hey!  I remember.  No problem, we'll have that one finished for you by 3 for sure." 

I know Autism Awareness month is over, but I'm thankful to Springdale Dry Cleaners for understanding that a boy can't sleep without his favorite blanket.

Brian

Sam's birthday is quickly approaching.  Don't tell.....I got him a family swing. He has always loved to swing, but we had to give up the full playset.  First, because it didn't fit in my backyard.  Second, because at 15 you are too big both chronologically and physically to still being playing on a playset meant for children under 10. 

I put this one together myself.  Of course, I couldn't just leave it like this or he wouldn't have anything to open on his birthday.  I knew before I built it, I would have to go to the hardware store to find a tarp to cover it up.  I told Sam to put on his shoes, we were going out.  He asked for his weekly Saturday stop for a Diet Coke @ McDonald's and I said, "Sure!  Get your wallet."  I forgot to tell him McDonald's was neither the only or first stop we would be making.  When we got to Home Depot without stopping for a drink, Sam was a little put out.   I was unsure where the tarps were and asked a very nice man who worked there, Brian, if he could help me.

Brian walked around with us to find the tarps.  He moved a little faster than we did, because the store was pretty busy and a lot of people needed help.  Sam was not in a mood to be rushed.  So I asked Brian to slow down and he did, which was very thoughtful considering the circumstances.  When we got to the tarps, I explained to Brian what I needed and why.  I did it in code because I didn't want to spoil the surprise for Sam's birthday.  Brian was very nice in making sure I got exactly what I needed because, as he said,  "birthdays only come once a year."  He even walked us to the front of the store to make sure we got checked out ok.  GREAT  customer service.  Much appreciated since Sam was not in a shopping frame of mind.  And he's right, birthdays are only once a year and Sam looks forward to them as much as Christmas. 

Brian, thank you for being so helpful and going above and beyond to make sure Sam's birthday is a good one!

Gale

Friday was filled with work, then shuffling kids from one pla ce to another for their work and doctors appointments.  Topped  off with a surprise visit to our local amusement park.  Sam was thrilled.  By the time I got home, it was late and I forgot to post, although I did not forget about saying thanks.

Gale, thank you for the heads up.  I'm on it.

Dana

One of my friends suggested that I thank my mail carrier since I am mailing something almost every day.  Unfortunately, we have been through several mail carriers over the last year.  Some of them are not so good about actually coming to my house.  Which I figured out after January 1st when there were long stretches that mail was not being picked up.  This week was one of those stretches. 

Anybody who knows me, knows that I am not one to hold back.  Some people might say I have no filter.   My best friend's dad says I have bigger (ahems!) than most men.  No matter the verbiage, the point is....I speak my mind.  Most of the time.  There are, however, a few people I tend not to criticize.  I typically don't harass my wait staff....too much access to my food.  I try not to annoy my gynecologist or dentist.  After 45, I'm including the person who does my colonoscopy.  Personally, I just think it's a good idea to be nice to the people who touch your food or parts of your body food enters and exits.  (Wow....so many things to say there that I had to clean up because this is a family blog!) 

But here is one that might surprise you....I work really hard to get along with my mail carrier and garbage man.  So when my mail was sitting...and sitting...and sitting...I said nothing.  Thank goodness for good neighbors.

Thank you Dana for having (ahems!) bigger than mine so that I actually got mail today. 

Rose

Kids with autism have an unbelievable amount of paperwork.  It typically all needs to be shared between agencies who will dismiss you from services without the paperwork, but, who can't actually share the paperwork on their own.  Quite frankly, life would be easier if you we're given a fax machine and secretary with every diagnosis of a severe disability.  Yep, it would.

Luckily, I have something better.  My son has an awesome special ed teacher who can email an IEP at will.  Thank you Rose!