Max, my oldest is not crazy about change. Over the years he has adjusted to it somewhat. But when he was younger, he HATED change. In 2007 he faced a lot of change. Bad change. His father moved out. We sold our home. Going from a very large house with a large bedroom, to a smaller house with a smaller bedroom, meant that many of his prized possessions had to go too. Change, change, change. The divorce and move were hard for everybody but probably the hardest for Max. My sister is one who is not fond of change either. (Those of you who know her can stop snorting and saying things like "That's an understatement.") She sent Max a letter about change with a box of coins. It helped him to understand and feel better about things. It also helped me.
Somebody who is dear to me, in the sense that she is important in my life and that she is very sweet, received some bad news today. Her school is closing. She hates changes too. I called my sister and asked if she could e-mail me a copy of that original letter. I remembered the basic theme, but not the specific words. I'm sure we still have it somewhere, but God only knows where! She found it on her computer and e-mailed it to me. It is so well written and made me realize the core of my discontent the last few months has been rooted in changes I don't want but can do nothing about. For example, next year I will have one high school senior and one high school freshman. Both are entering a realm I'm not ready to face for a variety of very different reasons. Quite frankly, it scares the hell out of me. My anxiety is probably no more than when I had one kindergartner and one pre-schooler. We all managed to survive that year. I'm sure we will survive next year and all those years that follow too.
Thank you for the wonderful letter Gale. It is as pertinent today as it was 5 years ago. I am copying and pasting so you can all see why I am thankful for my sister.
Change
I hate change. I went to Gold Star at the mall
yesterday and they had changed the cups they have always used. I could still
get a Pepsi with a straw, but it was different. It made me uncomfortable.
Why does any one want to change
anything when change feels so bad? There must be a reason because so
many people like to change things. Let’s think of some things that change:
-When you are little and you go to the bathroom in your
diapers, your mom has to change your diapers….that’s good.
-When you go to school you learn things and when you learn
enough you get to change to a higher grade level and learn more things so you
become educated….that’s good.
-When the seasons change it gets colder and then Santa can
pull his sleigh in the snow and brings fun gifts…that’s really good.
So some change is good. Of
course, not all things change:
-Your family always loves you and that will never change.
-As long as you have tried your best, you can be proud of
yourself and that will never change.
-You can always ask God to help you when you are
uncomfortable with a change.
-You and I are always going to
be a little unhappy when things change. We will just have to remember that some
change is good.
Here’s a little change I think you might like. (see attached box.)
Love Always (no change!),
Aunt Gale
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